


mending hands.

by orphan_account



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo Needs A Hug, F/M, Her small company is called REYSCUE, I wonder if I'll put some smut in there, Rey is a mess, Rey is the one that has trusts issues, She'll be very grumpy and angry and a bit of troublemaker, Yes Rey's is a handywoman, but Ben will try his best ok
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:07:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23166730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Rey has been Leia's handywoman for so long she didn't even remember a time they didn't know each other, but their friendship starts to shake when Leia's son seems to an irremediable arse hole.[It is also a SOCIAL MEDIA AU in @bentakenx].
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 3
Kudos: 26





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

Rey’s eyes weighted down; she could barely keep them open. As she entered her small apartment, her hands start to look for her phone, trying, somehow, find it by memory inside her backpack. Somehow, she found it inside that mess of bag. Her fingers already know what they have to do, quickly she’s finishing a text for Rose. 

_im_ _very tired, is there any work tomorrow morning? Please tell me no_

She throws herself in the bed, not much of a giggle, since that bed could, easily, be mistaken as a rock. Her phone beeped. In a rapid reflex, she was unlocking her phone, the brightness of the screen being the only source of light in the place and the only reason why her eyes were hurting too. It was Rose.

_No, you can sleep more! But Leia asked for you, she wants to know if you can go there after lunch, she needs a few repairs – her son is coming back into town and she is desperate for you. Anyway, thank you for covering for me today, I’ll pay you with beer and chicken wings later._

Rey wanted to reply but her eyes decided stop working and she fell asleep. Tomorrow she’d reply. Her last thought was about Leia and how much she treasured their friendship, it was very much like a mother and daughter bond she always hoped she had. 

* * *

It is a work in progress, I'm just putting the idea out there, so I can finish writing and if maybe I get the energy to do this.


	2. Coffee, anyone?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm also writing this at my twitter. You can check here: -> @bentakenx.
> 
> It is supposed to be social media AU, but I like writing, so I'm doing both.

Rey woke up too early. She had a terrible nightmare. Once again. Her dreams are often very simple, yet still scare her. She didn’t want to think about it. Instead, she reached her phone to text Rose. 

_Guess_ _who_ _had_ _a_ _nightmare_ _and_ _woke_ _up_ _too_ _early_ _._ _Ye_ _,_ _It’s_ _me._ _Good_ _morning_ _, Rose._

She stayed in bed for a while. Only later noticing that she slept with her dirty clothes and was starting to smell. Rey growled, so angry, and sleep deprived, headed to her bathroom. 

The cold water was a blessing in this hot summer. She probably wasted way too much water standing still there, but it was too fucking hot. After that, she just stayed in bed – wanting to rest. 

Her phone beeped. 

_Oh,_ _my baby, poor thing, you barely slept!_

It was from Rose. And her belly practically screamed of hunger. Maybe she and Rose could go out for breakfast. 

_Let’s_ _eat_ _breakfast_ _,_ _please?_ _I_ _have_ _no food._

Rose didn’t take long to reply back. Soon, Rey was out the door, carrying her backpack – that was too old, but served her nicely for all these years. 

She met Rose at their favorite place. _Rebellion._ Chewie always made the best pancakes in town, and his coffee... Damn. Rey loved there, she’d go there all the time, even had grown familiar with Chewie, as she likes to call him. 

She went to talk with Chewie, while Rose took the pancakes to a table. She was waiting for the coffees, but talking happily with the owner. 

“Here you, Rey, bom appétit!” Chewie says handing her coffee. “It’s hot, be careful!” Rey nodded with a bright smile. 

As she turned her back heading to Rose, she bumped at something, spilling her coffee at the thing in front of her. 

“Oh, fuck!” the thing said loudly, making Rey realize it wasn’t a thing, but man dressed in a fancy suit. He was very tall, very beautiful too. Dark eyes, dark hair. Piercing eyes. 

“Oh my god! I'm so sorry!” she said. Everyone at the place looking at them. “Are you okay? It did burn you?” she inspects his clothing, looking to see the damage she had done to him. 

“ _Just go._ ” the man replies almost spilling his words. She wanted to say something else, but he seemed enough angry. 

“Ok, I’m sorry, again.” she says before heading to Rose. 

_*********** _

It wasn’t long until Rey had to go to Leia’s house. If she needed to go there blindly, she’d swear her feets would know the way. She had grown so much fond of that woman, their friendship helped Rey in a manner she couldn’t quite explain, but was terribly happy and glad that it happened. 

This time, Leia needed to hang some shelves at her office. Her books were too many for the bookshelf Rey put together last week. That woman loved to read. Rey always loved how Leia was that intelligent woman, very cultural, there wasn’t a thing in the world that she didn’t know. 

She learned so much from her. And Leia never made Rey feel bad about her lack of... culture, as Rey says. She barely made out of high school, and living in foster houses didn’t do much for her. When she was fifteen, she managed to get a part time job, saving all her money so that when she’d be eighteen, she would already have money to live alone. She never needed anyone, really. 

The time passed very fast in Leia’s house. When Rey noticed, she was eating pizza with her friend, while they were laughing, Leia telling old tales of her younghood. 

A smooth voice filled Rey’s ears. 

“Mother, how can I remove coffee stains from clothes?” It was him. Rey felt her cheeks go red; her eyes widened. Her body went rigid. 

“Maybe next time look down.” The words spilled out of Rey’s mouth. Leia looked confused at her. 

“ _You._ ” the man said. 

“Rey, how do you know my son?” Leia asks. 

“I spilled coffee on him, this morning. I’m sorry, again.” 

“Poor Ben!” said Leia. Rey picked her backpack quickly. Ben. That was his name. He was still standing there. His eyes searching for information. That was that woman doing in his house? Ben didn’t seem anxious to join the conversation, so he heads to the corridor. Leia once again frowning upon his choice to leave. 

“I’ll be heading out, see you, Leia” Rey said, waiting for no reply and walking as fast as she could.

Rey was out before Leia could say something back. 


	3. a bloody meeting.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. I had a bit of no inspiration, and also had a hard time trying to explain some scenes at his chapter. English isn't my first language. I hope you enjoy.

Rey felt different. She was good for so long, and now, it was like something blossomed inside her, but she didn’t know what it was, she only understood her anger and the need to isolate herself. However, she couldn’t. She had to work. She looked one more time to Leia’s text. 

She couldn’t help but smile. 

_No worries, sweetie. You are practically family to me. I want to see you succeed in life._

Rey never had anyone, except her friends, and sometimes, she allowed herself to see Leia like a mother. She would always be grateful for the opportunities the woman had given her. She remembered the first time she met Leia. It was such a dark period of her life, the lowest she been. Leia surely helped her get out of that hole. And has been a bright light in her life since then. Not only as friendship, but she always found a way to help Rey’s work. 

She appreciated so much, nevertheless she couldn’t stand her son. The thought of having to see him a couple minutes made her feel on edge. Yesterday, Ben Solo had gotten her number to send a message. Leia needed her help and her phone was nowhere to be found. So, Ben texted her. 

Rey looked at the phone’s screen. She had to get going. Rey had finished a job and had to rush to Leia’s house. She also needed to buy food. Her eyes rolled – so much to do, not enough time. 

It didn’t take long to arrive at Leia’s house. Leia’s car wasn’t parked, which was weird. 

She rang the bell, no replies. No sounds coming from the house too. The sun was setting, coloring everything with a beautiful soft orange. Rey rang again. 

She sat on the sidewalk, got her headphones and started listening to music. Leia had probably left to do something and would be back shortly. She sent a text to Ben. 

_Did your mom leave? No one answers when I ring the bell._

She took her swiss blade out. It was an old gift from Rose, since Rey lived in such a dangerous neighborhood, she kept all the time with her, and sometimes, of course it no blades out, she liked to spin in her hands. Rey zoned out as the sun left and the moon appeared. Yet, no signal of Leia. 

Someone grabbed Rey’s shoulder, and as she jumped out of fright the blade stood out and grazed Rey’s palm, only to blood to come out. Rey looked over her shoulder, locking eyes with Ben Solo, whose eyes were widened and rapidly moving around, investigating the situation before him. It took a few seconds to Rey notice the pain in her palm. 

“ _Fuck! Fuck! Fu-ck!_ ” she almost murmured, her mouth opening in a silent scream. Damn, she thought that blade was dull, but even so, it still hurts. Her eyes closed. Ben Solo kneeled, standing closer to her. The light wasn’t very good. He grabbed her bag that was lying there, took his hands to her elbows, gently lifting her up, with little effort. Rey couldn’t help but notice how his hands felt like velvet, so soft and warm to the touch.

“Come, let’s go inside, please.” Rey didn’t contest. 

**_********_ **

Rey was sitting on the bathroom floor. Her injured hand was above the bath tub as the blood fell, dirtying the squeaky-clean tub. It didn’t hurt that much anymore, only a small sting. She could hear Ben’s steps coming towards. He was holding a small aid kit on his hands. 

“Here,” he said while sitting right beside Rey. “it’s not that deep, I don’t think you need stitches.” He poured something on her palm, while dabbing with a cloth. “Just keep it clean and lay off for a few days.” She gave a fake laughter. 

“Why should I trust you?” she says while looking at him. He is still looking at her palm, investigating it thoroughly. A quick smile on his lips. 

“I just know.” he replies, now he was putting a bandage on her palm. His hands were still soft, his touch felt different on Rey’s skin. “But if you don’t trust me, I can take you to an emergency room.” 

“No, it’s fine.” 

The silence reined at the bathroom, that Rey now found it very small with Ben there. He was a big man; his height was higher than most and he wasn’t all bones too. Rey noticed his muscles standing out in his black sweater. It seemed awfully small with him there. He had freckles and small moles on his face. That was something Rey never once noticed on him. 

“Thank you.” she says when he lets go of her hand. 

“No problem.” he gets up. Rey is still sitting at the floor, now, she seems smaller than ever. “But why do you have a swiss blade with you?” His face was looking down, his eyes were piercing hers.

Ben observed that Rey wore old clothes – they weren’t dirty, but they seemed worn out, he even saw small holes there. A normal person couldn’t look at these details, but tonight, he saw them. It wasn’t like he cared, it just made him wonder a bit of her story. 

“I live in a bad neighborhood.” she tried to stand up, but found it very hard to do with one and only using her legs' strength. 

“Oh, sorry. Let me.” he says before placing his hands above her shoulders and lifting her like it was nothing from the ground. 

“Once again, thank you, but I can stand up by myself.” her voice filled with a disdain. “You didn’t have to do that.” They were close. Rey saw how his hair was damp, his cheeks were flushed. Like he had just gotten out of the shower. Yes, a lavender smell filled Rey’s nostrils. Before, she could only smell the blood, but standing there, so near him, the smell changed to something very floral and lovely. 

“I was only trying to help you.” He answers, while looking down. Their eyes meet again.. “If I didn’t scare you, this wouldn’t have happened. I’m sorry.” Ben’s voice cracked, it got lower, almost like a whisper.

Ben felt extremely guilty, if he had approached her differently, maybe she wouldn’t have hurt herself. He could’ve done something different. His hands started shaking and his eyes trembled. His whole body got cold. Ben’s lips twitched, barely moving. Ben could tell a whole story his eyes. And Rey noticed. He breaks the visual contact as he walks out the bathroom. 

Rey didn’t move. She didn’t follow him. She looks to her hand, the bandage looks very well done, barely no pain at her palm. But why does her heart aches so much? She wondered.


	4. early texts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> small update, next chapter won't take long.

When Rey woke up the next morning, the apartment was colder, looking quickly to the window, she saw snowflakes falling and that the streets were covered in white. Somehow, she had forgotten that it was Winter. She loved the cold, it means less sweat, not that much harsh sun – and Rey already had her fair share of sweat and sandy places in her young age. 

Her hand didn’t hurt at all. It was only a bit sore, and the bandage had a very small spot of blood, she would’ve to change it later. Her phone had no texts too, poor Rose would have to cover her jobs for the next days and do her own too. It was too much work for one person. She’d text her later, to say that it was ok to cancel, if necessary. They had worked enough this month to pay their bills. It wouldn’t hurt that much. 

One thing appeared in Rey’s mind. Since yesterday, she couldn’t shake off the change of Ben’s behavior of her mind. Something felt weird about him, and Rey was almost worried for him. 

It was all she thought about while she was eating some old bread with eggs. Rey couldn’t stop thinking about him. Not romantically, sure, he was beautiful, but the concern was there. She thought of sending him a text, however the memory that they had talked last night surfaced – Rey didn’t want to trouble him, especially if he was already weird. But... Rey really couldn’t make herself stop thinking about him. 

It was something about the soft touches, how his hands felt weightless in her skin and his eyes. They looked unlike him, she thought they looked guilty, like he had done the worst thing in the world – and she made sure to let him know that isn’t his fault, she shouldn’t be playing with swiss blades, but it was a habit she couldn’t stop doing. She knew it was her fault for spinning the swiss blade in her fingers. _Fuck, wouldn’t hurt to send him a text,_ Rey thought. 

_Hey, good morning. It’s Rey. Hand is much better, thank you for attending it yesterday. I wanted to let you know that isn’t your fault, again. I hope you are well._

_PS: did you see the snow? I thought it wasn’t going to snow this year._

Rey pressed send and regretted a bit, she sounded like a teenage girl. It had been a long time since she had felt nervous around people. She knew she was good-looking, hell, Rey could always get everything she wanted – especially men. Why was she so nervous, then? 

Rey made herself occupied. Tried to tidy up her place, but it seemed a very difficult job to do one-handed, so she gave up. 

Her phone beeped and her heart skipped a beat. A rush of emotions flowed into her whole body, like cold water in the summer. Rey rushed to the phone and found herself smiling as she opened Ben’s reply. 

_Good morning, Rey. I am glad to know that your hand is better. Yes, I am a fan of snow too, but I must say I was caught off guard. I wasn’t expecting your text or the snow... I am happy about both things._

_Is there anything I could do for you, today? I assumed it was the reason you’d texted me._

She sure needed a few things around the place, like food. And coffee. And bread that wasn’t old. And she didn’t want to drive or go alone – she hated going groceries alone, that is why she’d always go with Rose. She read the text again, and her smile wouldn’t go away. _I wasn’t expecting your text or the snow. I am happy about both things._ He was glad that she had send him a text? Rey thought that he hated her, well, not hated, but at the very least, disliked her. 

_I could use company. I need to go grocery shopping, but I don’t want to drive or go alone. Do you have time today? My friend Rose is busy covering for me today, and all I have is... old bread and one egg._

It was weird that she had asked a guy she barely knew to go grocery shopping with her? It was. Did Rey care? Definitely no. She felt compelled, intrigued, there was something about him. 

And well, he was Leia’s son. He couldn’t be a psychopath, right? RIGHT?


	5. misunderstandings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has mentions of drunk sex (no explicit actions detailed), but be aware. Good reading. Stay safe.

Rey did not expect Ben Solo to volunteer to help her out. She did not. She was actually surprised when he replied asking for her address – saying that he would pick her up in thirty minutes. She did not. Still, she was glad that he did. 

Ben arrived fifteen minutes later. Shockingly beautiful, wearing black head to toe. 

“You ready?” he asks when she opens the door. Rey just nods, closing the door behind her and closing the distance between them, she was standing awfully close to him. Ben stepped aside, gave her room. She hated it. 

“Let’s go.” 

The drive went quietly. No one said a word except the music playing. 

“Did you change the bandage?” Ben inquiries. He is looking to the streets, driving very carefully, but holding the steering wheel too hard. Rey looks to her hand. 

“Actually, no...” softly she replies. “I had nothing at my house, I need to buy stuff.” 

“I...” his voice stutters. “I brought some things, just in case.” Rey looks to him. 

“You didn’t have to.” 

“It’s no problem.” 

They let silence rule over them again. The drive to the store took longer, mostly because of the traffic and that Ben Solo was driving too carefully. Rey didn’t mind though. The car smelled like him, she doesn’t know what it was, but she had grown fond of it. 

_****_

He didn’t talk much during the shopping. He just followed Rey while she walked around, getting everything that she needed. He thought it was funny when she stopped randomly, only to make calculations on her brain as to which product was cheaper, comparing the quantities of the product with prices. It was about how her face got all cute and _soft_ , even though he always had seen her as a tough woman. Almost childish like. 

After a while, the silence started troubling him. He hated how the place was bursting some loud music on his ears. 

“So, you work as a handywoman, huh?” he asks, breaking the silence. Rey stares at him, their eyes meet briefly before she looks back to the shelves. 

“Yes, since I was, I don’t know, fifteen?” Rey closed one eye, a thinking face. “Yep, fifteen.” 

“You started working early.” he states drily. 

“Someone had to get money, you know.” she picks a tomato sauce and starts walking down the aisle. Ben follows. “Not everyone is privileged as you.” The sentence took Ben by surprise. She continues speaking, very softly. “Not everyone has a loving family too.” 

“Why do you think I have a loving family?” he asks harshly. He knew he was privileged, but his family was far from perfect. He knew that very well. 

“Your mom is such an amazing woman.” Rey says back. Ben can’t see her face. They are still walking, but towards the cashier. “I don’t know why you push her away so much. You know, she tells me stuff.”

Ben felt the anger growing on him. He knew that his mother could be very absent and distant when she wanted. Hell, Leia did it very during his adolescence, it was one of the reasons why he found it difficult to be himself around his mother. 

“You don’t know the whole story.” he tells. “Maybe you shouldn’t be so biased.” Rey stops walking and turns around to face him, her forehead frowned. 

“Biased? Your mom is one of a kind. I wish I had one like her.” 

Ben made an angry voice, much like a growl. 

“I should’ve figured you were one of her losts cases.” Ben says, there is no softness in her voice, Rey can tell his anger. “You sound like just another puppet for her.” He checks her out. Again, with raggedy clothes, even her winter coat seemed older than her. “But don’t worry, she loves getting some poor loser and making them feel like they are special, because she couldn’t fix her son.”

Ben regretted every single word he said, but it just came out of his mouth, very impulsively. Rey's lips parted in surprise as she drew a long breath. She took the shopping kart of his hands, looked directly into his eyes. 

“Leave. _Now_.” her voice strong and clear. Not an inch of hesitation. He opened his mouth to say something, only to be interrupted by Rey. “Leave me, and fuck you.” Rey turned her back on him, walking away quickly. Ben could easily catch her pace, but decided not. He had done enough damage. 

He was left with the regret as people passed around him at the grocery shop. He couldn’t move his legs as he saw Rey walking away. He didn’t mean it. _Fuck_ , why he had to be so stupid. 

_********* _

Rey angrily left the grocery shop. The freezing cold chilled her bones. Well, the angriness would make her warm. It wasn’t that much of a walk too. Maybe 10 minutes? 15? She didn’t care. But she couldn’t believe that she actually thought that man could be nice. Ah, so silly of her to always have hope on people. 

It actually took twenty-five minutes to get to her building. When she got there, she was freezing cold. Rey loved the cold, but damn, that was too much even for her. She quickly took her phone. Rey needed to go out later, she needed to get drunk and do something stupid. 

_Can you go out later?_ She sends a text for Rose, whom she hoped had energy to go out today. 

Rey spent the whole day lying in bed. It was too damn cold. Around 7pm, Rose replied, saying that she was too tired. Rey couldn’t blame her, but that wasn’t going to stop her. 

She looked at the mirror one last time before leaving the house. Rey had chosen a sparkly tight black skirt, with a burgundy top and some dark make-up. Her hair was down. She definitely looked good and very ready to make trouble around town, by herself. She grabs her jacket leather as she leaves her house and heads to the street.

**_*****_ **

Rey went to any bar that was closer to her house. It had awful lightning and a questionable playlist if you ask her. But soon, it wouldn’t bother her. She went straight to the bar, asking for two shots of tequila and a beer. The tequila shots were nothing to her, and she sipped casually her beer while looking around the place. 

It had a few couple guys. And Rey was angry and had nothing related to anything that happened earlier today – she reassured herself. Some guy walked towards her, and he wasn’t all bad. He had a few terrible pick-up lines, but hell, if he would shut up, he’d be a lot more attractive. The interest on him faded as he continuing talking and made no moves. She rolled her eyes when he wasn’t looking and said she’d go to the bathroom. 

Except that she left the bar and decided to go another place. 

She found a weirder place, filled with red lights, but it had a lot more people. The place was awfully small to the amount of people there, however music was drastically better. She could even imagine herself dancing to it. 

She asked for three tequila shots, no beers this time. Drank it all with no effort. It didn’t take long until Rey was tipsy. It was probably the third guy that came talking to her. He was just as tipsy as her. And she wasn’t very drunk, she was still very aware of everything that has happening. 

“Do you want to come over? I can show you my place.” Rey said softly on his ear. The guy just nodded. 

**_*****_ **

When Rey woke up in the morning, her head ached. The guy was still lying in her bed. She kicked him. He moaned. 

“Hey, dude, you got to go.” she says, her voice rasping. The guy complains in sounds but surrenders when she kicks him with her leg again. She sees him taking his clothes and unlocking the front door. When he leaves, she goes to the door and locks it. Then, Rey walks very slowly back to her bad and under her covers. 


	6. late night talks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy the reading. Stay safe. If there's any mistake, please, let me know, I'm trying my best but sometimes mistakes do slip :(

Later in the morning, Rey gave up trying to sleep. Her hand was hurting a bit, more than the usual. Maybe drinking didn’t help. And she did slap her hand on the table while trying to explain something. _Oh, fuck_ , she thought while looking to her place. It was even messier than before. She, then, remembered flashes of her clashing around the furniture while drunkenly kissing a man. _Well, at least, it wasn’t that bad of a sex_ , sure, it wasn’t the worst, but it wasn’t the best either. And Rey really needed some good sex. She sighed. 

Rey’s thoughts were all over the place. She hated having too much free time, and even texted Rose to see if there was anything she could do, but Rose made sure she had everything under control, which, secretly Rey didn’t want, she wanted to go out, however, Rey was very happy and proud of her friend’s capabilities. 

Thankfully, the day went smoothly and quickly. A beep from her phone fills the quiet walls. It was from Rose, a short but straight to the point message. 

_It’s Friday I am tired but let’s go out_. A smile emerged on her lips. Damn, finally something to do. 

*

The night wasn’t as good as she thought. Sure, it felt amazing to see her friends. She was still acting weird around Finn, only because she wasn’t a fan of his boyfriend, Poe. One of the reasons that made their friendship grow cold. And that Finn was living a different life – he wanted family, a big house, everything he never had. It felt like all the things they shared in common were nonexistent. To certain extent, it was true and she was happy that he has having a better life. Rey guessed that is how life works. 

Luckily, she still had Rose. She came home alone, avoid drinking and any kind of casual sex. When she lied in her bed, she thought of her injury. She’d work tomorrow – she couldn’t stand staying at home doing nothing all day. Rey needed to feel like she was useful in something. 

** 

Leia still hadn’t sent a text or said anything to her. And she missed her friend. If were a few months ago, Rey could easily just ride to her house and wouldn’t have a second thought. It changed because now she was afraid to see Leia’s son. She needed to avoid him desperately. 

She didn’t believe his hurtful words, most of the times. As the night settles and her thoughts darkens, sometimes, Rey would think that he was right. One of the reasons that she had grown so affective of Leia, it was because she saw her a motherly figure. Rey should’ve smarter and less silly. She was an adult woman; it was probably time to let go of trying to find family figures. However, his words still hurted, echoing in her ears, because she knew she wasn’t some poor lose. And a part of her was curious about him – eager to know about him. _Just some guy,_ she thought. 

Despite her best judgment, Rey reached her phone, calling to Leia only to having no replies. She probably still had no phone. In a matter of seconds, she was pressing the green button as she saw Ben Solo’s contact number. 

“Hm, hello?” he says first, clearing his throat. 

“Can I talk to your mother?” Rey asks bluntly and dry. He mumbles something. 

“Hi, Rey!” Leia’s voice fills with her happiness. She really missed that bright voice of hers. “How are you, sweetie?” 

“I’m good, actually! Do you mind if I come over later? Me and Rose are missing your tea!” she tells, the manner that she speaks is very different than before, Rey’s face light up. 

“Of course! Come over, we’ll have a tea party.” 

*** 

They chatted for a good half hour. Rey interrupted their conversation only because she needed to help Rose. Even though her hand wasn’t fully healed, she wouldn’t let it stop her. 

They spent the whole day fixing some old lady. The poor lady lived alone – no family around. She had seen the flyers that Rey’d put up at the grocery shop and called for help. 

Rey’s heart ached with frighten, thinking that she would have the same fate. She had made a _mask_ , one that even Rose wouldn’t often see — only sometimes, when she was edging too much at the darkness. Rey was self-made, never needing anyone or anything. She thrived and was proud of saying. However, even the strongest carried scars, and she sure had some, even if they weren’t visible to the eyes. 

After arriving at Leia’s place, her body felt light — Ben wasn’t there, she knew because his car wasn’t parked. 

She laughed and giggled, rejoicing with her friends. Who would’ve thought? Leia surely had the age to be their mothers, but the three of them seemed like had grown together. 

Her heart felt almost whole at her chest, as Rey remembered that she wasn’t completely alone, after all. 

****

Everything was different at her place. Somehow, the silence was louder there. The laughter she had shared was echoing in her head, and even if it seemed like a good thing, it made her feel alone. Looking around at her apartment, to only see clothes laying around everywhere, some empty bottles of beer and old furniture. The air was cold too. The temperature was lower, the snow had stopped, but it was cold, nevertheless. 

She remembers Rose’s voice, suddenly, asking to let her know when she’s home. _Right, need to text her_ , she thinks. As she grabs her phone, a notification takes space at the screen. Her brow frowns as she reads. 

_Hello, Rey. This is Ben Solo. As you probably know, because I know, for a fact, that you have my number saved._

_Since that day, I felt like I was harsh and completely out of line. It wasn’t my place to assume anything about you or your relationship with my mother._

_It was wrong of me. So, I’m sorry. I hope you can forgive me. I am, indeed, an idiot._

_I also wanted to let you know that I will be off for a few weeks, and if you’d be so kind, maybe check on my mother? She’s been having these headaches lately. Anyway, maybe I’m asking too much. Goodnight._

She tried to reply to him, but couldn’t find the words. Instead, she just made sure Rose knew she was home, safe and sound. Later, she would think what to say to that man. Of course, she would check on Leia; she wasn’t sure about if she’d apologize for his rudeness. 

Later she would do something about him. Right now, it was the last thing on her mind. Rey wanted to go sleep and dream a bit. No time for rude and privileged men. 

Clock marked 3am when Rey started moving around her bed, restless and most important, sleepless. She groans filled with anger, by the touch of her hands, she tries to find her phone, lost in her nightstand. She finds after clumsily dropping things. The brightness of the screen stinging her eyes a bit too much. She, then, remembered that she didn’t reply Ben Solo. _Well, fuck it,_ Rey thinks. 

_sure_ _dude it’s all good_ _its_ _your second chance_ _im_ _not giving anymore for you. don’t worry despite you thinking the worst of me, I actually care for you mother. did that even when you_ _werent_ _around!_

She didn’t bother reading to look for grammar mistakes, Rey hated having to write properly in a text. At the end of the day, it really was just a message on a stupid phone. _Why do people needed to write perfectly?_ She always questions herself. 

However, Rey did not expect her phone to beep this late night. It sure wasn’t Rose, because she knew Rose had to travel early morning to visit her parents and her sister. 

Without looking, she searches with her hand for the phone again. He had replied. 

_Duly noted, Miss Johnson. No need to throw at my face that I wasn’t around for a while. I blame myself already about that. Nevertheless, why are you doing awake? It’s too late for anyone._

Argh. Perfect commas and spellings. Rey reminded herself that he always was perfectly dressed, not a spec of flaw on his clothes. Or his black luscious thick hair. 

_Cant_ _sleep_

Her replies are sent instantly, not even needing to think much about it. 

The sun is peaking at her windows when Rey notices that she spent too much texting him. She had learnt a few things during a couple hours texting him: 

1\. Ben Solo had trouble sleeping as well; 

2\. He was traveling soon because he needed to organize his stuff. He was moving next to his mother after living away for so long; 

3\. He was better at texting than talking in person. At least, he wasn’t half as rude. 


	8. over texts and boxes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good reading. Stay safe, kids.

Ben and Rey were texting constantly. Actually non-stop. Checking her phone after waking up was the first thing she start did in the morning. Rey also made sure to check it during her breaks, between jobs. While she was eating, after taking showers. Nothing too deep or personal, mostly just jokes and small talk that never ended. Only one time that she said she felt lonely, because Rose is away for a while — taking care of her pregnant sister. He seemed to understand, if that’s is possible over a text. 

During the time of two weeks he had been gone, she found herself liking his friendship. Somehow, he wasn’t that bad. Sometimes, he even seemed _nice_. 

Rey knew he was back in town. It was Monday and she made sure she didn’t have any work to do. She even asked where he was living, implying that she could pop by to help him. He declined, but she pushed him a bit, and soon Ben was telling his address. 

This morning, checking her phone wasn’t the first thing that Rey did. She recognized the aching at her temples, her hands moving to stroke there, a hangover and the strange naked body lying next to her. _Wasn’t his name John?_ She couldn’t remember, but it was either John or Thomas. She had hooked up with him twice, even so, his name is still not a question mark in Rey’s mind. 

“Hey,” she says softly. “I need to leave soon; can you get up?” Rey presses her index finger onto his biceps. The guy moans. It was surely too early. 

“Really, Rey?” his voice muffled against the mattress. 

“Ye, really.” as she replies, he makes an ugly noise, wasn’t loud, but it wasn’t pretty too. He grabs his t-shirt that was laying around somewhere. 

“See you, later?” he asks, scratching his beard and gazing at her. She gives a soft smile, not very reassuring to say the least. He licks his teeth, his mouth opening, to make a sound that resembles a click. 

After John or Thomas leaves, she follows his steeps, making sure to lock the door. She scavenges for her phone, nowhere to be found around the small place. 

**_*_ **

Rey finds it the pocket of her jeans, tossed next to her bed. A notification. It was Ben saying that he had arrived with his shipping. He had told her that moving closer to his mother was necessary, ever since the _oficial_ divorce of her parents. He didn’t tell why; Rey didn’t think it was her place to ask too. 

She only saw Leia’s ex once, and barely knew the whole story behind it. Leia always had glossy eyes when she spoke of him, that is something Rey noticed. 

She took a longer bath. The warm water running over her body and hair— that smelled so much of alcohol and cigars, mostly John or Thomas’ fault. Rey wasn’t a fan of cigars, but smoked a few last night, only to kill the nostalgia she felt of inhaling something. 

******

It was around 10am when Rey was standing outside of Ben’s apartment door. Their first encounter after that awful day. They even talked about it over texts, and he apologized again, telling her how much of an idiot he actually is. 

The building was beautiful. New, but somehow old, touches of industrial architecture that gave a hint of modern. Ben welcomed her, a very soft smile, barely there, but somehow, she managed to catch it. 

“I came!” she says very excited, waving her hands. He closed the door behind her. The place is a mess, boxes everywhere and so much stuff to assemble. For a second, it seemed a bit rushed, and Rey supposed she was being. However, he was the son of her dearest friend. 

“Sorry, it _is_ a mess.” he mumbles. 

“No worries. I know how moving can suck.” her voices seems agitated compared to his. “Where do you want to start?” 

“Can you set up my desks?” he asks. “I have no idea where my tools are. E-verything is everywhere...” Rey laughs, while nodding with her eyes closed. Ben starts walking down the corridor, he points his finger to a room that looks like an office. 

“Don’t worry, I got you.” she says while taking off her backpack, letting go of the small suitcase she carried. When she opens, there is all sort of screwdrivers, screws and a small hammer. “I came prepared!” she holds up in the air two screwdrivers that had slightly different tips. “I even brought my drilling machine, if you wanted to hang frames. It’s in my car.” 

“You are very kind, thank you. I can see why my mother only trust in you.” he says, his voice very low. “I’ll just unbox some things at the kitchen, yeah?” 

She nods with a bright smile. It doesn’t take long to Rey to assemble the two desks in front of her. After so many years, her hands could know how to do that even if she had closed eyes. Especially the ones from IKEA, they were too easy to build. 

After finishing, Rey walks towards the kitchen, finding Ben storing his plates and glasses of water in a cabinet. 

“I’m done.” she says. “Is there anything else?” a soft music playing, barely there, something with a piano and a guitar. 

“No,” he looks to his watch. “It is almost lunch, though.” It almost sounds like an invite in Rey’s ears. As she looked at him placing the plates, she got reminded that he hasn’t a small man, somehow it had slipped her mind. Which it meant he was clearly strong enough to build some shitty desks from IKEA. He didn’t need her help _at all._

“I woke up later, not very hungry.” she says, looking around and placing her hands together, inside the pocket of the hoodie. She scrunched her nose as she tells him. 

“Oh.” his lips barely moving. “Mother said she was coming, because she wants to see the place,” he closes the cabinet louder than he expected. Places his hands at the white marble counter. “She is bringing a lasagna. If you are interested. I know she’d appreciate.” 

“Sure, no worries.” she says, taking her hands off the small pocket. Ben looks at her hand. 

“Is it better?” he asks, jerks his head towards the hand that was once injured. Rey looks at it, barely seeing anything at the palm, the scar vanished, leaving a small trace of it behind, almost invisible. 

“Ye.” Rey shows him her palm. “Barely a scar.” Ben gives a small smile, but bigger than the first one. 

“I’m glad.” he replies back, a very distinct touch of sincerity in his voice.

“You want a beer?” he opens the fridge, taking two bottles. He opens both, before handing one to Rey. 

“Oh, thank you.” she says, a small silent moan skips her mouth, just the shape of it, like she is glad. A joyful face when she takes the first cold sip of it.

Strangely, the conversation wasn’t as vivid. Rey found it difficult to make small talk all the time, maybe in texts things were, indeed, easier. She just sat there, drinking beer and listening to the soft music playing while he finished moving his silverware around. 

One thing that breaks the silence was the loud sound of his doorbell. Finally, Leia. 

“Honey, it looks nice.” she says, kissing Ben at his cheeks, while gracefully holding his head with her hands. When he closes the door, Leia looks to her trusty handywoman, sitting there with a bottle of beer. “Sweetie!” she rushes to Rey, giving a tender hug. 

“I came to help.” Rey explains quickly. Ben doesn’t talk much. _Was he always that quiet?_ She wonders. 

“You’re too thoughtful.” Leia talks. Placing the large, squared bowl at the counter. A beautiful lasagna, the smell invading and filling the room. “Your favorite.” she is looking at her son when she says it. Something sparkled in him. Rey didn’t want what it was, but his eyes told her for brief seconds.

***

The lunch made Rey feel like an intruder. Even though Leia was making sure to juggle the conversation to her. It was a mother-son gathering and Rey was there. Friends to Leia, and barely a friend to Ben. She hated every second of it — not because of them. Mostly because of how she’s an outsider there, she knows she isn’t family. Their meal seemed almost like a too special moment that she barged in, maybe they asked only because they were overly polite. Even so, she managed to engage into the conversations, sometimes a glare coming from Leia, a hint of worry, when she was being awfully quiet — something so unlike her. She would never allow herself to do something like this again. Ever. Because, she felt awful, however, making sure to smile and speak in a happy pleasant manner. Her body was slightly stiff, her spine straighter than the usual. Her whole existence being the synonymous of uncomfortable. 

When they were talking, Rey zoned out, only wanting to say some random excuse and leave. But it wasn’t very nice of her. They were still eating. She barely ate, even her belly was graving for something to fill it. She felt awfully nauseous, in a way she never been before. Her palms sweating a bit. 

Rey tries to dismiss her thoughts and focus on their conversation. They are talking about Leia, she needed glasses and somehow, always managed to skip her doctor’s appointment — which annoyed Ben, he made sure of it, since his tone of voice seemed more like a growl. 

“Fine, I’ll take you myself then.” Ben says. A victorious smile on Leia’s face. 

“Thank you, my son. I’d love to spent some time with you.” such tenderness in her voice. Rey’s phone beep. Finally. That way she could give some excuse and go home. She quickly grabs it, looking to the screen. They are still talking about doctors. When she didn’t notice, Ben looked at her, his eyes ever so slightly curious. He’s still starring when she stops looking at her phone, lifting her head. 

“Hm,” softly Rey spoke. “I need to go. Something came up.” She is now standing. “Thank you... For the invite.” 

Ben and Leia stand at the time, Leia gives a small kiss on her cheeks. And Ben was now standing next to her, placing his hand at the small of her back, barely touching, as he guided to the door. He opens the door; his face was looking down. Their height different sure were a thing. 

“Thank you for helping.” Ben says. She can hear Leia taking their plates to the kitchen. “It was really nice.” Rey nods. 

“Don’t worry about it... Well, _bye._ ” The last word lower than the rest, spilled out of her mouth, practically. Rushed. 

“Talk to you later?” he asks with a clear voice. Rey nods again as she steps out carrying her stuff. 

Ben waited for her to completely leave his sight. When he made sure she had left, he closes the door quietly. 

As Rey entered her car, she felt something prickling in her throat, much like a knot. Her eyes started to water. She smacks the steering wheel, her lips pressed together. 

_“No, no.”_ she talks to herself, battling the tears at the limit of her eyes. Not a single drop falls down her face. She won’t let it. 

**** 

Rey didn’t text him. He had sent a message asking if she got home safe and thanking her again. But she didn’t reply. She knew she should do it, but didn’t find the energy in her to actually do it. 

She fell asleep watching some horrible film, the lights from the television reflecting softly at her walls, the hazy sounds echoing through the walls. 

Her sleep didn’t last much, as she wakes up around 4 am. A sigh escapes her lips. _Fuck._ She felt alone again. In the middle of Rose being away and Finn too busy with his boyfriend, she had no one, really. Except Leia. However, she had her son now. He has living fifteen minutes away from her. Who would call a handywoman when she was her son nearby? 

Yes, Leia was her dearest friend, but she has enough troubles on her own — she works too much and did have her family. They were close friends, but somehow, to Rey, it felt like it was because she was useful around, she had helped Leia. The question, to her, was much more similar to: _will even Leia ask for my help?_

Sorrowed filled her chest. Everything that she had gathered, after that lunch, returned. She wouldn't cave again. Releasing a strong exhale, she presses her hands to her chests, almost like trying to push it down. She manages to calm down, somehow. Her hands automatically rush to her phone, laying there at the nightstand. 

_Can’t sleep. You there?_

Quick fingers. Perfect spelling and commas. She did text him too much. Rey closed her eyes, enjoying the noise made by the television. 

Her phone beeps. It’s him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit sadder, I think, huh. I wanted to explore Rey's feelings -- she tries to hide it, but sometimes, they surface and even so, she denies it. I am thinking of making this a very slow burn... Ben's kinda of a shy guy. I'm still figuring it out, trying to see where this story leads.


End file.
